Should have been the halfway mark. We were scheduled to have our 'regular' ultasound today. Why do I remember that? Because it is Christopher's birthday. So, is it a good idea to schedule things like this on days that already have a special meaning? Well, yes and no. No because in this circumstance I have a constant reminder of what we did not get to do today. But yes because there was still something special about today and helped keep my mind off of it. I only thought about it once today - unfortunately, it was in the middle of music class at VBS this morning.
Noah hasn't mentioned the baby in a while but Benjamin has made a number of comments this week. He wants me to get a bike trailer for my bike so the boys can ride with daddy and I can pull Abby and 'Benjamin Scott Campbell Frank.' (That is the name he had picked out for the baby.) He also has been laying his head on my tummy during nap time. He says he can hear the baby in there talking to him. It's cute but a little upsetting at the same time. Sunday we were at the zoo having ice cream and a lady close by had a tiny, tiny baby in her arms. Benjamin rummaged through his imaginary backpack, found a 'tiny baby', and pushed it into my tummy. "There, Mommy, now you have a baby again." If only it were really that easy, sweet boy.
So, that is where we are today.
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